From The Adventures of Jess and Mimi
FLIGHT FROM HELLSo heres a good story. I had a wonderful time in florida, which was then ruined by my flight home. I was supposed to leave fort lauderdale at 825, and get to detroit at 1125. The plane was delayed until 845, no big deal, so we get on, and I have an aisle seat in the back. It turns out we are waiting for some people from another plane. Well a man with a family comes on screaming that he will never fly spirit again, and yelling that they told him there is no room. Of course his seat was behind me in the back, and the rest of his family a few in front. He is now shouting and violently opening every over head bin and telling the whole plane that there is room. Hes putting his carry on away, and making a big scene.
The flight attendants asked him to calm down, but he wouldnt. So they made the decision to call the security. Now the security comes on board, and they get to his wife and kids first, and ask them to get off the plane. So the man gets up from the back to see whats happening. He says they are not leaving! The security says: this can be the easy way or the hard way, walk off like a man. The man says, im not leaving! and turns around to walk back. This is when the security grabs him and now they are fighting in the isle! Also backup was called, so they are all fighting, he is still resisting and yelling, falling into the rows, I inched closer to the middle seat. Now the wife is yelling they are not leaving! and passengers are getting involved, children are screaming, I couldnt believe my eyes. Finally they were able to drag him off. The whole thing seemed to be handled unprofessionally, and then the security told us he will be going to jail.
Now we have to wait for them to get off all the overhead luggage that he scattered everywhere, and his luggage under the plane. Then another couple wouldnt stay quiet and they were asked to leave. One man then kept yelling, and the security told him in front of the whole plane, shut the fuck up, or youll be next. After all this, they realized that the man had gone to the bathroom, and that was a security threat, so they had to have someone come check it out. We sat on the plane for 2.5 hours!!!!! During this time, I was making a hundred calls to my friend in windsor who was going to pick me up, I told her to forget it, its too late. Then I was begging the shuttle that goes over the boarder to windsor to wait for me. They said they would wait until 2am, and not a minute more, supposed to leave at 145.
The only good thing was that I was reading a great book! the sequel to twilight! I only got off the plane at 2. Before we took off, I stood up and said: excuse me, is anyone going to windsor? No one was. But one very nice lady offered me to stay at her house in Detroit! So the airport started to empty out, and I got nervous, didnt know where to go, and finally found a taxi, we made a flat rate of 68 US, and I arrived home at 3am. The worst part was, I packed my bag so heavy, thinking my strong friend was going to carry it up, so now I had to carry it stair by stair, I thought I was going to die! She did go into work for me the next day though!! I got into bed, wide awake, and read my book until 410!
by Jessica 1/1/09
The Adventures of Jess and Mimi | <<Home
From nourish the spirit
THE COMICAL FLIGHT FROM HELLI left Clemson a week ago for a whirlwind trip through Memphis, Little Rock, Hot Springs and New Orleans. Atlanta was completely fogged at 10 in the morning. I went to the computer to check in and it could not find my reservation, the agent told me to go over and stand in line so that a desk agent could assist me. The line was pretty long and three people were working at the desk, yet six people were helping at the electronic check-in station, and no passengers were over there. I find that odd and a little inefficient during a weather day.
My reservation was located and I was informed my 12:00 flight was canceled and now I was on a 2:30 flight. My sister was supposed to pick me up in Little Rock so we could drive to Memphis for the weekend. As I waited, she came up with the idea that I try to switch flights and take a direct to Memphis so she could leave. I asked the gate agent whether it was possible, and she told me yes, although I'd have to go wait in the line down the hall, which was extremely long. If you haven't flown recently Delta has a new system of automatically re-booking you if your flight is canceled. They will scan your boarding pass and a new itinerary with a boarding with print in the form of a receipt. If that doesn't work you stay in line and pick up one of the black phones or call an 800 number and another person will assist you. Then you wait in line again until your new boarding pass prints, a semi-effective system.
Also, a public service announcement, if your flight is canceled due to weather related issues and you have to stay overnight, you will not be put up in a hotel. Delta will only give you a hotel voucher if your flight is canceled for mechanical reasons, good to know. So back to my story.
I finally get to the agents scanning boarding passes and I tell one of them I do not need mine scanned but needed to be re-booked on a flight to Memphis. She said they couldn't do it because it is a security risk of my luggage flying on a different airplane than me. I said I wanted my bag switched as well, and she said no. I said well people fly all the time without their bags because you lose them. Slipped out, Ooops :)! So then I turned around and grabbed one of those cards with the 800 number on it and stayed in line. I told the agent my ride had left and I need to get to Memphis, she was gone a while and then came back and said she tried to do it but couldn't because it was outside the 100 mile radius from the airport I was supposed to land out. I said how far, she said it was 130 miles, seriously. Since I was already in line, I decided to stay in line and wait to see someone at the desk, third time is the charm right. I put on my best sad face and asked really nicely for her to switch me since my initial flight was canceled. SUCCESS, I was on the Memphis flight, and she said my baggage would be switched!! I'll believe that when the bag arrives on the belt.
That flight was delayed multiple times as well, then we finally got on the plane. The captain said there was good news and bad news, we were on the flight but fuse wasn't working and they needed to get one from the hangar. It would be about 20 minutes and then they would turn off all the power to fix it and the emergency lights would come on. He said it was a great opportunity for us to see what a plane would look like if it actually lost power. Yeah, I think I'd rather not experience that up in the air, but thank you for the educational lesson. They replaced the part and the captain said, the good news is we replaced the part, the bad news is it was not the problem. We all had to deplane while they looked for another plane for us.
The pilot came up and made an announcement that nobody heard. Someone informed him that would couldn't hear so he came over to where we were sitting. He said they are still looking for another plane, but they have located a replacement part somewhere an hour or so away and they were bringing it, so we would at least be able to take off at 9pm, remember I left Clemson at 8am. Then he said our other plan is to "cannibalize" another plane for the part and then we could take off earlier. UMMM, there are so many things wrong with that statement, but if we are cannibalizing a plane, making it unable to fly, why not just take that plane. Nobody asked me for my logic. The last option is what actually happened, we got back on our plane. The pilot made another announcement, "Our estimated flying time is one hour, but they give us a little leeway on that time so I'm gonna fly this thing like I stole it. We're going Mike speed tonight." The comic relief was most helpful at this point in the evening, it was about 8. So we safely arrive in Memphis and my bag did not come with me, shocker. Why the heck would someone on the tarmac receive a baggage transfer request and then take 15 minutes out of their day to go digging through the belly of a plane just to find one bag and then make sure it goes in the belly of the correct plane. Geeze, I was totally a security risk since my bag flew on a separate plane than I did.
So I wore the same clothes for 2 days. In three tries to get some information on the location of my bag, I was informed that Delta had contacted the delivery company and the driver was supposed to call me. Apparently either Delta lied or the game of telephone didn't work. The driver called alright, but he called to explain how sorry he was because two bags were tagged with the same number (by Delta) and he delivered it to the wrong hotel. He figured out the mistake and corrected it on his own, and said that he was never contacted by delta or the delivery office. Hmmm.
by Carin Vadala 11/26/08
nourish the spirit
From Prisoner of the White Lines on the Freeway
AMERICAN AIRLINES FLIGHT FROM HELLI am very used to travel between the Middle East and Houston. But this week instead of booking me directly into Houston on Emirates, or into Atlanta via Delta, my company booked me thru London on British Airways connecting into Dallas and a connection to Houston again on American Airlines.
So on Wednesday morning, after a seven hour flight from Dubai on British Airlines, I made my way from Terminal 5 at London Heathrow to terminal 3 to get on a US bound American Airways jet.
After killing four hours people watching in Heathrow and sucking Starbucks, I made my way to the gate and boarded a 767, AA flight 51.
Here the fact you are back in a American Flagged plane hit me. The 767 was old looking in appearance and contained no personal video screens that are standard on overseas flights from Delta and Emirates. The seats contained a small set of ear buds, not head phones. But the biggest fact was the onboard staff. I only saw one guy attendant. He was grey haired with a 80's style cut. He rarely ever spoke and was very effeminate. The rest of the cabin crew were old women. The attendant in my cabin was black, with a fake ass set of dyed red braids bolted on top of a rats nest of grey hair. Her ass was so fat she rubbed the seats on both sides of the aisle the few times she actually engaged in any work. Again contrasted with a Emirates crew where the mostly female crews are younger and slim, friendly and professional. I blame the stewardess union for this. Why people believe that a career should be made out of passing out pop to customers on board is beyond me. And not one of these old girls would have been of any use in the event of a emergency. American and the US Airline industry should hire faces that represent the companies to the public well.
We boarded on time and settled into seats for the 10.5 hours to Dallas on the slow decrepit old jet. But we didn't leave not until 4 hours delayed. The first class door had a problem and would not shut. The mechanics worked on the door for a couple hours, then the Captain announced that we were waiting for FAA approval on the repairs, from some jackass in Tulsa. We are in London, and were waiting on approval from someone in TULSA??!!
The aged, fat and extremely unattractive flight attendants broke out some water after 3 hours of waiting on the plane at the gate. And then one of the old girls began counting empty seats in Tourist class, yikes were they really stuffing more people on this plane?
No the plan was to move first class passengers into tourist class for take off and landing and get the plane in the air. Anyone who wasn't comfortable with the door could get off. I am sure that these folks who forked over major money to fly up front, were thrilled with this.
Five intelligent passengers got off and after waiting for their luggage to be identified and removed from the hold, we were off.
The meals were pathetic, with only one beverage service. Its like American has even quit trying. The catering companies would have provided excellent meals if American would budget for them. I have had good airline food on both British Airways and Emirates. The snack service was a child's personal pizza with about 10 grapes. Very nice for a three year old.
The only bright side was the flight attendant gave me a whole can of coke with my meal, a real can not a small one, popular on flights these days.
Into DFW and wow things only got worse. 100's of people waited to get the passport scanned by the 3 available for US citizens. I had flown from Baghdad on Monday and the Iraqis do a better job. One jackass from the customs border patrol started screaming at citizens that no cell phones could be used in the area and was roundly ignored and people including me yelled back for him and the other 2 supervisors watching the crowd to get into a booth and start processing people.
American Airlines has fallen into the same trap as the rest of the US Airline Industry. Instead of charging a fair price for a ticket, they continue to hold ticket prices at their lowest, and cut maintenance on the planes, and reducing the service on the flight. It was a miserable flight and I will never fly American Airlines again. It should be required training for International crews and management at ALL US Flagged carriers to fly on a Emirates flight from Dubai to Houston. Look at how nice the jets are, how Emirates hires efficient and attractive individuals for cabin staff. And the meals are actually restaurant quality. And American buy some decent jets and market yourself to discerning travelers. Most folks would gladly pay more for a better flying experience. by John Beard 10/23/08
Prisoner of the White Lines on the Freeway
From Simply Dee
TRAVEL & FLIGHT FROM HELLTraveling can be quite draining, be it long or short distance travel. With the work I’m doing, I either travel every month or every few months and there are times when I fly in and out the same day. Reason being, it saves time and money but on the other hand, it just drains you out mentally and physically.
I had one of the worse traveling experiences yesterday. My flight to Kuala Lumpur and the journey to the meeting was smooth sailing however the journey back to the airport and the flight was horrendous. Firstly, it took the taxi an hour (or more) just to get out of KL City and another hour to get to LCCT. On top of that, it was raining heavily, I swear I was in the middle of some flash flood! If the taxi driver wasn’t so smart (by cutting in and out of the traffic) we probably would have been stuck there for a few hours. Unfortunately with all the jumping queues, it made me a little nauseous so the entire two hour trip to the airport I was sick to my stomach. Thank God for ‘minyak kapak’ for emergency use.
Fortunately my flight was pretty late so by the time I arrived at the airport I still had 2 hours to kill….not. After freshening up in the vanity room, I decided to check in early since I didn’t have any luggage with me. I checked the information board, it said:
AK5112 Kota Kinabalu 2125 (check in counter : R29)
Naturally I and the rest of the passengers bound for Kota Kinabalu walked over to counter R29 and guess what, we were directed to counter R41/42. wtf? Now will someone enlighten how difficult is it to go to the computer and type R41? Anyways, when I got to counter R41/42 the damn line was as long as the Mekong River. I looked at the time and it was still an hour early, so I decided to have a quick dinner. Quick it was and by the time I returned to the counter 30 minutes later the river turned into Yangtze and it looked like it hadn’t moved since I left. So I queued. Finally, it was my turn; 45 minutes later, not a word of apology from the airline staff…nothing. Right.
Then came the flight and as per normal we got delayed by 20 minutes. The plane looked like it was purchased during the Vietnam war in the 1960s. It was that damn fucking old. The seats looked like they were about to just collapse. But never mind the plane, the journey itself was the longest 2 1/2 hours of my life. There were at least half a dozen babies on the flight not to mention one behind me who happily kicked my seat for an hour. The grand prize of all was the baby boy who screamed for the entire 2 hours. I couldn’t quite tell by the faces of the other passengers if they felt sorry for the kid or his parents or they wanted to kill both. They were only two rows in front of mine by the way, so imagine the deafening sound of a kid screaming at the top of his lungs for 2 hours in a plane 35,000 feet in the air and no where else to go. Honestly, I feel sorry to those who travel 13 hours with a screaming baby on board. Lesson to all new parents, DON’T EVER TRAVEL WITH YOUR BABY!! It annoys the hell out of other fellow travelers!
Obviously the little kid was restless to a point of annoying. I made a conclusion by observing and analyzing how the baby screamed. In the beginning it was a genuine cry, you know like ‘mummy, I want milk and I’m sleepy’. Then it got to where it sounded like his parents were beating him up with a cane, torturous. Lastly, it was the kind of cry that would probably make the parents want to batter him. The cry of desperation and just plain a.n.n.o.y.i.n.g.
While I’ve had many other bad experiences when traveling, this story, however, really deserves a mention on my blog. I want to thank the kid’s parents from last night who inspired me for this post and I also want to wish them the greatest luck in bringing up that kid. May God Bless your entire family. by Dee 8/28/08
Simply Dee
© 2008 Simply Dee
From Nefertiti Online
MY VACA TO JAMAICAI just returned from Jamaica on Wednesday and overall I had an incredible time. It was the first time ever that my entire family (from Canada, England, Florida, NY and Jamaica) were all there at one time. We stayed at our family house in West Retreat, Portland and it was crazy, lol…In the house was my grandma, her 3 kids, their 7 grandkids and her great grandson...on top of that, there was all these other random kids there all the time…the bad thing tho was that people kept eating out all the food…lol...for example, we would go shopping one day and get all this food and drink…by the end of the day, there was nothing…It was like that all week. It got so bad that people started hiding food in their rooms, lol...I guess that's what happens when you have about 20 people in your house everyday. Besides my grandmother's clan, we also visited her sisters (she has 4) and their families and that was great!
The trip overall was low key for all of us. We went to the beach and shopping but that was really it. The week (oh I forgot to mention that I was down there for my bday too…July 25th) was all about family and I loved that. I got so much rest that I think that my body went into shock. My phone was turned off the entire week and I didn't check any of my emails…it was great. The bad part…the day I left! It was an absolute nightmare…and come to think of it, so has the last couple of days since I've been back.
First, my aunt basically took all the pics for us (I also used her camera). The day I was leaving, her camera malfunctioned and erased all the photos…everything! I felt so bad but I felt even worse for my aunt because she looked like she was about to cry. Then my grandma got into it with my cousin (love u grandma but you were wrong) and it just left a sour note on the day. We left the house at 12 pm for the airport which is a 3 hour drive!!! We got to the airport 2 and a half hours early and guess what? The flight (Air Jamaica) was delayed and we did not leave till after 7pm…so we basically sat in the airport for over 4 hours. Then once on the plane, the TVs weren’t working as well as they served the nastiest food that I ever ate…oh and I also had a broken knife in my salad!!! Then the flight attendants had this major attitude…I pressed the call button for some water and no one moved…I had to get up and go to the back of the plane for my own water…then while serving tea...the attendant kept ignoring me after I had the audacity to ask her what kind of tea it was…My grandmother had to ask for tea for me! Oh but it gets better…The flight ran out of gas!!! Yes, it did, lol...so we had to go to Baltimore to get gas…which took 3 hours because according to the crew…the weather was bad (even though it wasn't raining) and there was debris in JFK on the landing strip and they were cleaning it…I was like WTF??? By the time we got in the air and flew half an hour to JFK, shouldn't they be able to clean that up? Anyways… we ended up landing in NY at 2am…so a flight that should have taken 3 hours and 40 minutes took 9 hours…that plus the car ride to the airport equals about a 14 hour commute…then it took another hour for us to get our luggage (we left customs in under 10 mins but took an hour for luggage, ridiculous) …My grandmother and I left the airport after 3am and we both hailed cabs and got home around 4am…I felt bad for my grandma bc she had to be at work by 9am…and she looked so beat…oh and that day we left…was her birthday…
So that's the way I ended my relaxing vacation…with the flight from hell…I refuse to ever fly Air Jamaica again. But like I said earlier…everyday since that was bad for me. As soon as I turned my phone on it was this person complaining about this or needing me to do that…everyday its been something else…I lost my bank card, ripped my new dress on a train (up the butt mind u!), had to deal with customers from my store…just too much. I'm hoping that the following week will be better tho…fingers crossed!
by Nefertiti Jones 8/3/08
Nefertit Online
© 2008 Sun Goddess Productions/Digital First Strategies
From A Broad in Belgium
ANALYSIS: A FLIGHT FROM HELL, DOGS AND BEN
Anyone who knows me well knows three important things about me. 1. I hate bad lighting . 2. Airplanes scare me. 3. Not crazy about dogs. Probably in that order.
Last weekend, my daughter and I took the afternoon plane from Nice to Brussels during which time I had the misfortune to sit in front of an 8 year old boy and his 4 year old brother. Did I mention there were no parents? Yeah---You see where this is going.
Aside from the 18 summons to the one flight attendant, the kids opened and closed the tray table 100 times, kicked the seats for one straight hour, pretended to vomit into the airsick bag, and kept saying “Hello Moto” (Motorola tag line) in a voice that was a cross between Gilbert Godfrey and Yoda. Google them both and you’ll understand the headache.
Analysis: I think the airline purposely put a mother in front of these children. Any single woman would have had her uterus frozen the moment she got off the plane.
Upon our approach into Brussels we hit a lot of turbulence. I become very religious when I fly. At take off and landing, I pray for salvation and promise never to do all those things I just did last month ever again!
Analysis: I am psychotic, not religious.
So, I bowed my head in peaceful prayer only to be interrupted by Ben (found out his name was Ben) yelling “We’re gonna die. We’re gonna die.” The little brother, thinking this was very amusing, decided to join him. In chorus, from row 16: “We’re gonna die. We’re gonna die.”
I very rarely complain about airlines. In fact I always make it a point to thank the pilot and flight attendants when we land. But Brussels Airlines is really starting to piss me off. Not only do they not let you make changes to your flight any more (not even for a fee) unless you have paid a full FLEX fare, but the ONE flight attendant on this flight spent 80 % of his time ignoring these pranksters, responding only by giving them candy and chocolate instead of asking them to stop or splitting them up. More puzzling...These children were crawling under the ticket desk, turning on the microphone and tapping at the computer in Nice. They were out of control BEFORE we even boarded and the personnel did nothing!! I am sure it was a matter of passing the buck, or the Ben, off on someone else to deal with. I know it’s not the airlines responsibility to manage unruly brats, but it is their responsibility to insure the safety and comfort of the other passengers isn’t it?
Analysis: Am I wrong? Do I pay 180 euros tax on an 80 euro ticket for this treatment?
The man across the aisle from me must have seen the terror and frustration in my face because he patted my white-knuckled grip and said it would be ok. Then sternly asked the boys to shut up. A total stranger, non-airline employee taking it upon himself to do the right thing. Bravo.
I turned on my phone right when we landed to inform my ride we’d be out soon. The flight attendant immediately came to my side and said, “Phones must remain turned off until the plane is at the gate and the cabin door is open, as use of electronic items can interfere with the planes navigational system..” Now he shows up.
Analysis: WTF?!? We’re on the ground. If the pilot can’t find the gate from the runway in broad daylight, we have bigger issues than your navigational system.
For all you dog lovers out there, I am giving you a concession right now. A rare, dog loving concession. Print it. Save it. Use it against me the next time I rant about the piles of dog doo doo in the streets and on the escalators of Brussels. Here it is:
“I would rather have had two canines of any breed sitting behind me, drooling all over my seat back, maybe even pet them once or twice, possibly one in my lap, than have had these two beasts behind me. Any day. Dog beats Ben---paws down.”
There. I said it.
Analysis: These kids must have been the spawn of the devil himself.
I saw Ben again at baggage claim (still no parents around). He had the nerve to say to me “Hello Moto, It’s us again.” Like a young Jack Nicolson from the shining saying, “Here’s Johnny!”
Ben is going to be in jail in 5 years, I am certain.
Final analysis: It is not only dogs that need to be kept on leashes.
by Kimberley Lovato 4/21/08
A Broad in Belgium
More Guest Blogs 1 | 2 | Next » Back to Top |
|
